ALLISON & ME












As many of you know, we took a long weekend and went to San Diego to visit my sisters Valerie and Michelle (for those of you who are confused: Michelle is my ex-stepsister who we continue to consider our sister) and to reconnect with some of my old friends. The highlight of my trip actually was our first night in San Diego when we had dinner with my friend Allison who I have known literally since birth! Our mothers were best friends and they were pregnant with us together. Allison was born on July 11th and I was born on July 31st.

As young children, Allison and I were VERY close. We have always been as different as night and day, but we some how always remained best friends. From birth up to about 8th grade we stayed very close and spent a good amount of time together. Once in High school we were always friends, but did not hang out together much. As in the past, but more so once in High School, we were very different. Allison was popular and had completely different friends than me. I was a band geek and really hung out with only one person, my friend Terri. Regardless, Allison was ALWAYS my friend whether we hung out a little or a lot.

Once I left for college we completely lost touch and I have seen her only a handful of times in the last 20 years and I have not seen her or talked to her AT ALL in the past 10 years! I do not know how we slipped out of touch, but we did. When she walked in the door of the restaurant and we saw each other, I just could not stop smiling! The realization of how much I truly missed my friend came flooding down over me. We were surrounded by my family so it was hard to “really talk”, but still the closeness and love I have for Allison has not faded even in the tiniest bit. Seeing her again was like “going home”. Most of my best childhood memories have Allison in them. The hours of playing, riding horses, swimming in the pool, sleeping out in the back of the pick up truck, going to camp together and the list just keeps going and going.

I was not a popular kid in Junior high and I was teased a lot. Allison was in the “in crowd” and considered very cool and had tons of friends. However, Allison never ditched me because I was not in the “cool crowd”. We did not attend the same school, but she always made it clear to her friends that she and I were best friends and that made me feel special during a time when everyone else made me feel inadequate. Even when we had nothing in common, our childhood friendship was the glue that held us together. Do you have a friend like Allison? Do you have someone who stuck up for you when it was not cool for them? Those friends are special and ones you should NEVER let go.

We managed to slip out of touch for 20 years, we slipped out of complete contact for 10 years, and I do not want that to happen again. Thank you Lord for blessing me with the opportunity to reach out to Allison and to re-connect our friendship. This weekend was great and seeing Allison and her mom and dad, who were like my second set of parents, was fantastic! Thank you for allowing me to go down memory lane again with Allison and I pray that we will now move forward in getting to know each other all over again. Thank you for friendships that last a lifetime!

THE TESTIMONY OF A CHILD

Look at this picture of Jessica! This is a picture of Jessica with Samantha about 2 days after her 2nd open heart surgery in July of 2004. In this picture she has 3 chest tubes in her, she has every wire in the world hooked up to her, she is VERY sore and yet she still manages a smile for the picture. This picture captures the topic of this post perfectly!

After I helped Jessica post her blog on Friday about her experience of reaching out to Izzy before her triple by-pass surgery, the Lord really opened my eyes to see my daughter in a new light. I am looking at my 10 year old daughter and I am TRULY understanding how much this child has been through. Within 10 years this child has been through 3 major open heart surgeries (first one was 9 hours long and in the hospital for 2 weeks, the second was 11 hours long and she was in the hospital for 1 week and the third one was around 9 hours long and in the hospital for a week) and she has also had 7 cardiac catheterizations (like an angioplasty), not mention the COUNTLESS tests they do before and after each surgery and cath! I am 38 years old and the only time I have EVER had to stay in a hospital is when Jessica and Samantha were born, that is it! I know this is going to sound awful, but I feel I have become desensitized to some degree of what this child has been through not only physically, but mentally. It is not that I was not emotional, scared or anxious about her heart condition and all the medical stuff she has undergone, but once it is all over and she is home, life just moved on as usual. I have been pondering that in my head and wondering how it is we were able to just move forward with life after going through these things that are not only very traumatic for Jessica, but for her family as well. Then it hit me, we were able to move on pretty easily because Jessica hardly ever complained about ANYTHING. I am not saying it was easy as pie, we did have our challenges, but for the most part she was so easy going. I can honestly say that Jessica has never used her heart condition as an excuse to not try something. When she was recovering from her surgeries she could have "milked" her state to get extra sympathy or to manipulate people to do things for her, but she never did. She never acted like a victim. She did have questions as to why she was this way, there was a time when she was a bit angry at God for her condition and she would periodically have little "pity parties", but they were SO SHORT LIVED! Instead, she has chosen to be positive and look for the good in the life she has been given. She is one of the most optimistic people I have ever met and this child works hard for everything she wants. She is such a blessing!

My prayer is that the Lord will continue to teach me how to take life as it comes with optimism and joy. Sometimes we are dealt a pretty difficult hand in our lives. How often do we whine and complain about how unfair life is? How often do we act like a victim? I know the Lord has used my daughter's testimony to teach me that even in the "rotten" things we have in our lives; we can turn it to glorify Him. Don't let this world beat you down and rob you of your joy. Let testimonies like Jessica's speak to you and give you encouragement to allow Christ to lift your burdens and look at life in a positive light. To see what your life CAN be not what your life is not. Isaiah 40:31 says "But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Thank you Lord for giving Jessica to Steve and I. We do not understand why our child has a non-genetic heart defect that has the odds of 1 in 10,000 cases. We do not understand why she was allowed to have this condition. On this journey with Jessica you have shown us how BLESSED we are that she has no limitations, she is not on any medications for life, the likelihood of her living a long and normal life is good and that we live in a country where these kinds of conditions can be fixed. How many families in third world countries or even among the poor in our own country have lost their babies because adequate medical services were unavailable to them? Why were we granted this grace? Why will our child live a long and fairly normal life when other children with the same condition or even less serious conditions die at a young age? Why Lord did you allow us this grace? We do not deserve it any more than anyone else, yet You blessed us in this way. We do not understand Your ways. Even when they work in our favor, we still do not appreciate the scope of your grace. The only way we can thank you is to recognize and accept your grace, then turn around and glorify your name. Lord help Steve and I to continue to teach Jessica that the only way she can thank you for the grace you have shown her is to use her testimony to bring ALL glory to you. To use her experiences not as an excuse to be a victim, but as a way to show how truly awesome you are. Thank you for revealing this truth to me through my beautiful daughter who demonstrates her acceptance of your gift of grace when she does not even fully understand that is what she is doing.

OUR FIRST NEIGHBORHOOD TRAIL RIDE & POTLUCK

On Saturday October 7, 2006 we hosted the first, but hopefully not the last, neighborhood trail ride and potluck. We had a small group both at the ride and potluck, but hey it is a start!

Around 9:30am 3 trucks pulling horse trailers pulled out and were on the road to Pena Adobe park. We had 2 neighbors (Sharon & Carol), myself, Susie and Tracey all saddle up and hit the trails. It was a beautiful day and the horses were great. We rode for about 1 1/2 hours and had a delightful time just enjoying the beauty of the land and the animals we rode and chatting with each other.

After the ride we headed home, cleaned up and got ready for the potluck. We had a total of 8 neighbors, plus my mom and the Helton's come up for a potluck fellowship. We had a wonderful time getting to know each other and hearing about each others lives. Some of the people who came and not been in our house in several years and they had fun checking out all the changes. Candace, they LOVED the colors you chose for the house! Many of them commented on how nice it was to see more than WHITE walls!

I was really hoping more of the neighbors that I did not know at all would come, but I was grateful for the ones who did come and just coming to realize that we have some VERY nice people in our area and I honestly want to spend time with them and get to know them better. I created an album for you to view of the day we had together. Unfortuantely, I had a hard time getting them to run in order. So, they are not in order, but you will get the general feel for the day. The link is http://new.photos.yahoo.com/vckdwsn/albums. Hope you enjoy the pictures!
I hope that future albums will document a steady growth of building community and making new friends. Thank you so much to my friends who have encouraged Steve and I step out and make this day happen. The gathering was not huge, but it was full of great conversation and the laying of a foundation to build relationships on. Thank you Lord!

MY NEW LIFE ON THE ROCK

Today I was continuing my week long cleaning and room organization in preparation for our neighborhood horseback ride and potluck on Saturday. Since most of the people who are coming to my house have never been inside I thought I had best get our office and downstairs bedroom uncluttered and looking nice. We have lived here almost 2 years and I am JUST NOW getting around to getting the office area completely organized and the downstairs still had stuff lying around from Christmas last year. Pathetic, I know. Another confirmation my life has been too busy for too long!

As I was putting things away downstairs I opened the closet and noticed that all my ministry file boxes were neatly stacked one on top of the other with blankets, extra pillows and other things neatly placed on top of the waist high stack of boxes. Each box was properly stacked and labeled Crossculture, Small groups, Puppet Team and The CORE. It was tidy, organized and looked very secure as the door slid open. I decided that I had best go through all these ministry boxes to clean them out and organize them in such a way that I can hand them over to the youth ministry to be available to assist those who will take over the ministries I was in charge of. By accident, I leaned against one of the boxes and everything on top came crashing down to the floor. Hummm…..I guess all the stuff piled on the stack of ministry boxes was not as secure as they looked. Just then it dawned on me…..my life was once balanced on the ministries I worked in. Noticed I said it was balanced on the MINISTRIES, NOT on Jesus. The stuff piled on the boxes would not have fallen if they were stacked on the floor…the foundation. My life MUST be placed on the foundation of Christ, not on ministry and not on church…. on JESUS.

I think this whole revelation was spurred when I saw the stack of boxes because I had just finished my reading for this week’s Bible study/book discussion of Rob Bell’s book Velvet Elvis. He said “The goal isn’t to bring everyone’s work into the church; the goal is for the church to be these unique kinds of people who are transforming the places they live and work and play because they understand the whole earth is filled with the kavod of God. God isn’t in one building only. Doing things for God happens all the time, everywhere.”

For the first time in my life I am stepping out without the church, without a ministry label, without a title, without a bunch of my Christian friends around me and without an evangelistic agenda and I am going to just love my neighbors. Two weekends ago Susie and I took our love for horseback riding and reached out to my neighbors who share the same love and 7 of us went horseback riding together. We did not go with the intention of saving lost souls, we just wanted to connect with people, get to know them and love them just to love them. We will do that again on Saturday with our second horseback ride as a group. Will God move in this new group of horse lovers? Maybe. Will we set up every ride to witness? No. Another Rob Bell quote I love from Velvet Elvis is “I love how Paul put it in Colossians: Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus. He is teaching people to live as Christians, and then whatever they do will be sacred, holy work.” If our lives are firmly built on Christ then everything we do will bring glory to Him, everything we do is worship and the people around us will see Jesus. Living Jesus outside the four walls. Wow! Okay Lord, lead the way!